The day after the Seahawks’ win, the word “thug” was uttered 625 times on American television, or more than on any single day in at least three years. Here is the story you never heard.
Top 7 Reasons Peyton Manning Is More of a Thug Than Richard Sherman
“You were merely adopted by the thug life; I was born in it, molded by it.” – Anonymous
1. Peyton Has A Strain Of Marijuana Named After Him
Super Bowl 48 is being hailed as The Bud Bowl, The Stoner Bowl, The Weed Bowl. Both teams come from states that have legalized recreational marijuana. Not soon after Denver legalized a strain of marijuana bearing the name of Peyton Manning began making the local rounds.
FULL DISCLOSURE: A strain named after Marshawn Lynch was also created.
2. Music Video Street Cred
3. Peyton Can Make It Rain
And I’m not talking touchdowns. Peyton earned $173.6 million before his 35th birthday as a member of the Colts, and signed a lucrative, year-by-year, $96.5 million contract for five seasons with the Broncos. He’s going to get paid well over a quarter-billion to play football. This doesn’t include his endorsement deals either which is estimated at well over another $100 million. It’s astonishing, especially when you compare it to the 4 year, $2.2 million contract Richard Sherman has. So far, Sherman has made a grand total of $1.531 million in his career. Manning’s game checks were $1.125 million in 2013. He made as much in two weeks as Sherman has over the course of his three-year career.
4. Chartiy Work With Children
The video tells the whole story. Not only does Peyton go out of his way to tattoo children, use them to pick up hot chicks and bean them in the skull with the pigskin, he guides them through life’s most important lessons – like how to break in to cars. What’s more thug than that?
5. He Also Feeds Stoners
On November 6th, the state of Colorado decriminalized marijuana. On November 8th, Peyton Manning bought 21 Papa John’s franchises. Coincidence? I think not. There are also completely unfounded rumors that Manning Incorporated attempted a hostile takeover of the Frito-Lay company so that he could monopolize the Funion industry.
6. Manning Doesn’t Sell Records – He Breaks Them
Peyton has 43 regular season records, another 13 playoff records, four rookie records, 9 Pro Bowl records, 58 franchise records with the Colts and another 10 with the Denver Broncos. That’s 133 records in his professional career. Richard Sherman has 0 records.
7. He’s Got The Bling To Prove It
Last time I checked, one Super Bowl ring is more than none. And while Richard Sherman talks a big game, he’s not even in the discussion when it comes to Defender of the Year, and while it’s totally adorable that he won Defensive Player of the Week three times, Manning has won four league MVP’s. Sherman may have been born in to the thug life, but Manning lives and breathes it every day.